Sex on Earth as It Is in Heaven by Jung Patricia Beattie;

Author:Jung, Patricia Beattie; [Jung, Patricia Beattie;]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781438463810
Publisher: State University of New York Press
Published: 2016-01-15T07:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 7

Cultivating Sexual Desire

As noted earlier in this volume, for much of its history Christianity (mistakenly) viewed celibacy as the sexual ideal for all humanity, not just for those with a special calling to it. Consequently, routine sexual abstinence and celibacy was encouraged even in marriage, when its mutually agreed upon practice didn’t lead to masturbation or infidelity.1 Martin Luther rejected such commendations because he viewed them as unrealistic and, hence, unwise counsel, but he did not reject celibacy as the moral ideal. Over the centuries Protestant and Catholic theologians concluded that because there would be no sex in heaven, if and when desire wanes, as long as its “loss” was mutual and not a problem for one’s spouse, it might well be ignored or even considered a blessing. This inattention to the loss of desire was reinforced by the stigma associated with it. It was often considered so emasculating that its admission by men was rare.

However, if as I have argued sexual desire and delight should be envisioned as sanctified in the life to come, then any decline in the experience of desire should be considered prima facie problematic, even among those who are called to renounce its genital enjoyment here and now. Properly formed sexual desire ought to be nurtured and celebrated, not only because its reciprocal enjoyment may serve marriage but as a holy sign of the life to come. The development of ways—disciplines, in the technical sense—to foster virtuous experiences of sexual desire becomes an important Christian moral task. (I argue from this perspective in the final chapter that the use of pornography should be seen as problematic not because it stimulates desire but more precisely because the erotic desires it enlivens are malformed.)

In this chapter I explain why the nurture of sexual desire is an important moral task for those who experience no or low sexual desire. Initially, I review why teachers of the church have hesitated to discuss the cultivation of sexual desire. Then I highlight often ignored insights about the cultivation of desire from several sources of moral wisdom such as the Bible, tradition, and the experience of faithful Christians as well as scientific studies. I conclude that we need to expand our very conception of sexual virtue. Chastity should connote practices that strengthen and intensify, that nurture and humanize expressions of sexual desire, as well as disciplines that curtail its lustful expression.

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